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Writer's pictureJessica Fahy

Use battle terms with your boys!


I had tucked the boys in bed and proceeded to bless them with holy water and pray over each of them. First Joseph, then I moved to John-Paul. After I prayed over John-Paul, he sat up in his bed and said, "Mommy, Mary wants me to be her soldier?" His eyes were lit up. "Yes John-Paul. She does want you to be her soldier. She wants you to fight for her Son, Jesus." He was beyond excited to hear this. (So much for him being able to fall asleep soon after that because this got his mind thinking and imagining!)

If there's one thing that motivates and excites our boys for the Lord, it's knowing that they're His soldiers. So I must say: Parents, do not be afraid to use battle terms with your boys!

Why?

For one, battle terms are replete in Scripture. Yes, we find it used in the wars and battles that have taken place throughout salvation history; but more importantly we see these terms used with the spiritual warfare we are engaged in. St. Paul speaks of this often and most clearly in Ephesians 6:

"Finally, draw your strength from the Lord and from his mighty power. Put on the armor of God so that you may be able to stand firm against the tactics of the devil. For our struggle is not with flesh and blood but with the principalities, with the powers, with the world rulers of this present darkness, with the evil spirits in the heavens. Therefore, put on the armor of God, that you may be able to resist on the evil day and, having done everything, to hold your ground. So stand fast with your loins girded in truth, clothed with righteousness as a breastplate, and your feet shod in readiness for the gospel of peace. In all circumstances, hold faith as a shield, to quench all [the] flaming arrows of the evil one. And take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God." [Ephesians 6:10-17]

That's some very strong imagery. Our boys actually have a poster of this Scripture verse hanging in their room (thanks mom-mom and grandpa!) and it looks something like this:

A second reason is that boys just have in them an urge to fight. Instead of suppressing this entirely - which is a rejection of God's natural design of the man - it must be channelled and directed to be used for that which is good, true, noble and honorable. I've spoke of this in a previous post I wrote called Dirty Socks are a Sign of Manliness. But I will remind us of what we are up against: In our culture, either manliness is suppressed entirely in order to soften the man to make him a weak and wimpy pacifist or it is perverted to the other extreme: That of male domination to the exploitation of women and others in order to gain his own advantage and selfish desires. Neither of these is true manliness as God has made it - they are both perversions.

Our kids really like the old classic Lassie episodes (yes! the old black and white ones!). In one episode we watched, the main character (a ten-year-old boy) Timmy was being treated unjustly and being made fun of. He told them to stop but they obstinately continued in their wicked ways. So Timmy threw a few punches, the kids got in a scuffle, they broke themselves up, and headed home. When Timmy got home, he told his father and mother what happened and his dad gave him a pat on the back. "Well Timmy," his father said, "sometimes fighting and defense is a necessary evil." I thought to myself, "Ha! This television show would get sued if anything remotely like this was aired today! They'd get the anti-bullying police on these people..."

Anyway, boys have in them a drive to fight and be rough and tumble! I see it clearly when my daughter plays with her stroller: She pushes it so calmly and nicely with a baby doll tucked inside. When my boys get a hold of it, look out! They are within minutes like a tornado loose in the house, knocking things over, putting each other in it only to have to topple over from pushing it at invariable speeds around bends and corners, and so on. You get the picture. Boys - they want to play swords and guns and wrestle and play fight. Yet, I do remember - because of the conditioning of our effiminate culture - asking myself, "Yikes, should they play with guns? Should they be pointing them at each other when they play?" I'm over that now, but in today's society with a shooting around every corner, you can't help but think that. These are real concerns of parents about "how" to let their boys play. I remember interiorly facing these questions. Guess what? The danger isn't in the toy gun or the make believe of cowboys and indians (politcally incorrect, sorry); it's in the child's homelife and the lack of love within the family or it's mental instability or it's in the inability to channel and direct this drive toward what is good and true and honorable, in a word, selfless reasons, not selfish reasons.

So use battle terms with your boys!

Boys want to fight! Remind them what their fight is against: their sins. Remind them who their ultimate enemy is: the devil.

"Do you know how you fight the devil?"

"Prayer and not sinning."

"That's right. It's fun to pretend to fight him with swords and guns but the real weapons Jesus wants us to use are prayer and especially the Rosary! St. Pio called his rosary a weapon!" (Ok, let's hope they don't think they can start whipping their rosaries around now...)

It's important to remind them too that they can't win the fight without Jesus and Mary, lest they think their strength is found in themselves rather than the Lord. It's good to remind them this too:

"Joseph, can you fight the devil and sin by yourself?"

*Smiles candidly and shakes his head* "No...with Jesus."

"That's right, our strength is in the Lord and from the Lord. We can't do it by ourselves. We need Jesus. Pray always to Jesus."

It's not uncommon that our boys like to get dressed up in their costume battle gear to "fight the devil," as they put it. They run around and play this with their friends too. Of course, they exclaim it with much enthusiasm while chanting, "St. Michael the archangel, defend us in battle!...." Yes, expose your boys to a devotion to St. Michael the Archangel and teach them the prayer. What boy wouldn't think he's the coolest angel ever? He has a sword and is depicted as crushing the head of Satan! Our boys love this.

"Then war broke out in heaven; Michael and his angels battled against the dragon. The dragon and its angels fought back, but they did not prevail and there was no longer any place for them in heaven. The huge dragon, the ancient serpent, who is called the Devil and Satan, who deceived the whole world, was thrown down to earth, and its angels were thrown down with it...They conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony; love for life did not deter them from death." [Revelations 12:7-9]

We need to remind them often that we are in a battle to get to heaven and the only way we will win is if we are on Jesus' side.

Here's a picture of our boys during our morning prayer. They insisted on dressing up in their armor and "saluting" our Lord. They stood completely still (unheard of) for almost 10 minutes, as they insisted I keep singing hymns for them to "stand firm and loyal." (Mind you, I didn't suggest this to them or anything at all - this is all of their own doings...and usually, these things are...lol)

By the way, here are some great hymns for boys. My boys love to sing these ones (we actually have them memorized - part of what we do in Morning Time), so we've sung them while cleaning, in the car, etc...

Faith of our Fathers

For All the Saints

Forty Days and Forty Nights

It's verses like this that they love...

"Oh may Thy soldiers, faithful, true and bold,

fight as the saints who nobly fought of old

to win for them the victor's crown of gold.

Alleluia, alleluia!"

Or verses like this...

"Faith of our fathers, living still,

In spite of dungeon, fire, and sword;

Oh, how our hearts beat high with joy

Whene'er we hear that glorious Word

Faith of our fathers, holy faith! We will be true to thee till death!"

I'm sure there's plenty more hymns that are great like this, but that's all we have memorized (so far!).

Tell stories of the saints!

There's also tons of great saints stories to illustrate heroic courage and virtue in the face of the darkest trials and torments. Just recently I read to them a story about St. Maurice from a book called Sixty Saints for Boys. He was a Roman soldier in the early centuries of Christianity. He - on behalf of his 6,000 other Christian soldiers - refused to pray to the pagan god of war, Mars. As a result, the emperor tried to scare the Christians into praying by executing a portion of St. Maurice's legion (about 600 men). This is how it's described in the book:

The emperor said, "I order you to kill one man in every ten all along the rows!" ...So that was what was done and all the rest of the Christian soldiers stood stiff and proud and prayed for the souls of their friends.

The emperor then went back to Maurice and asked if now he and his men would like to join the rest of them to pray to Mars and then attack other Christians in Switzerland? The story ends:

And all the Legion shouted, "No!" So Maurice and all the rest of his 6,000 men were all killed then and there...What a wonderful thing it must have been in Heaven when the whole of the Theban Legion (St. Maurice's band of soldiers) with Maurice at the head, marched in to see God.

How awesome. I like this book because it tells it in more of a story-form rather than dry facts, which is great for children. After I finished it though, the boys wanted to hear the story again. And so, I read it again. Yes, we should be teaching our little children that dieing for Christ is a worthy thing. They need to hear the stories of the martyrs and their heroic courage. We should not be afraid; if we are afraid, it's because our faith is lacking.

Our boys also love the story of Blessed Jose Luis Sanchez del Rio, which we listened to as an audiobook from Glory Stories. He was a young boy, only 14 years old, who lived during the persecution of the anti-Catholic Mexican government in the 1920s. His heroic tale is one in which we see even the smallest and least likely among us can joyfully endured all the pains and torments and ultimately death for the cause of Christ. Jose actually joined the Cristero war (at age 14) in their fight against the Mexican government to try to stop its relentless and bloody persecution of Catholics. Yes - boys want to fight! Let's give them something noble to fight for! The story is truly inspiring. The recent movie, For Greater Glory, portrays these events that happened not so long ago for an adult audience. But again, our boys enjoyed this story and seemed to be enraptured by his fearless courage and loud, continuous shouts of "Vivo cristo rey!" up to the moment he was shot. What great heros for our children to emulate!

I cannot say enough how important it is to paint the spiritual life in battle terms for our boys. Especially because they're boys! Let's give them something noble to live for...and to die for: Our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ!

The LORD is my strength and my shield,

in whom my heart trusts.

~Psalm 28:7

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