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  • Writer's pictureJessica Fahy

2 simple ways to deepen your prayer life


When one realizes that desire to go deeper with God, one may think they have to do more. This is a good desire. But sometimes when they quickly pile more on their plate, it can be overwhelming and too much to keep up with. Good resolutions fall by the wayside and, in the long run, no progress has really been made.

Let us start (or for some of us who have been praying for years, re-start) simply.

Perhaps some of us have been familiar with prayer for years, perhaps our whole life. We've grown accustomed to various devotions and prayers that we now know by heart. This familiarity, whether it be with the Divine Office, the Rosary, the Mass, the Our Father or Hail Mary prayers, and so on, can lead to a lukewarm spiritual life maintained only by outward disciplines, but which lack true heart and spirit, IF we are not vigilant against these temptations.

So with that, here are two simple ways to deepen your prayer life right now.

1. Recollect yourself before you pray.

St. Teresa of Avila, when speaking of the First Mansion in her book Interior Castle, has this remark about recollecting ourselves before we begin prayer:

Interior CastleIf a person does not think Whom he is addressing, and what he asking for, and who it is that is asking and of Whom he is asking it, I do not consider that he is praying at all even though he be constantly moving his lips. True, it is sometimes possible to pray without paying heed to these things, but it is only because they have been thought about previously; if a man is in the habit of speaking to God's Majesty as he would speak to a slave, and never wonders if he is expressing himself properly, but merely utters the words that come to his lips because he has learned them by heart through constant repetition, I do not call that prayer at all - and God grant no Christian may ever speak to Him so! [St. Teresa of Avila, Interior Castle, Chapter 1, p.7]

This is such an easy temptation to fall into when we are familiar with certain prayers that we've grown up with our whole life. Or when we become accustomed to entrusting to God petitions that we pray for day in and day out - sometimes you just rattle them off without much consideration of being in the presence of God and to Whom we are addressing these. In the Carmelite tradition, this is called putting yourself in the Presence of God. It means we take measures to call to mind and remind ourselves (because we are frail creatures and forgetful!) of Whom we are before and Who is with us.

2. Slow down.

In the book The Soul of the Apostolate (an excellent read, by the way, for understanding how to bring together the contemplative and active life, which are not opposed as some people misunderstand), Jean-Baptiste quotes St. Francis de Sales:

Haste kills all devotion. [St. Francis de Sales]

While St. Francis de Sales was talking of the Breviary, we can easily apply this to our own vocal prayers. Think of the daily Rosary or the Divine Office. Let us not be a "speed prayer" in order just to complete it for the day - that misses the entire point which is to come in contact and union with Christ. Imagine that you're sprinting down the street during a run and you see someone you know, whizzing by them saying, "Hi! How ya doing? Gotta run!" That's kind of like how it is with God when we pray in such a manner. Praying without the devotion of our heart and in a hastily manner can actually become offensive to God because who else but Him, above all, is worthy of our time, pause, and considerations throughout the day? To further assist us in this manner, Jean-Baptiste Chautard recommends carving out a specific dedicated space of time the best we can to ensure devout recitation. Praying while being willfully distracted (our lips utter words but our minds are willfully fixed upon other occupations) or without due consideration and application of our hearts is a fault we should bring to confession if we've committed it. To guard against these temptations, Jean-Baptiste recommends such:

If I have the habit of mutilating certain words or ceremonies, I shall apply myself, and go over these faulty places very slowly and carefully, even exaggerating my exactitude for a while. [Jean-Baptiste Chautard, The Soul of the Apostolate]

Read the Gospel or your daily meditation slowly (perhaps a 2 second pause between each word). Pray the Hail Mary slowly (or at least slower if you have a quicker pace). This may mean adding an extra 10 minutes to that time you pray to ensure it's devoutly prayed, but it will bear much fruit and reap great benefits for our spiritual life and progress. Use a timer, providing sufficient time, and then forget about time and spend it with and in God in the the eternal moment. As a mother with unexpected interruptions and babies or toddlers who don't always cooperate with routines, I must strongly insist that we need to be creative and go through extra pains in carving out space and time for prayer, then adjust and give God our best as we go. I don't buy in to the fact that "we just don't have time." We do. And occasionally, yes, it might happen that a day slips by here and there where we aren't able to spend sufficient time with God. It spontaneously happens and we can't help that but must address the duties of our state in life and tend to our dear little ones. However, we must observe the overall pattern of our prayer life, minus these unexpected inconsistencies that we can't help - how does that look? And then we must take action and make creative changes if we notice that our daily mental prayer life is lacking or superficial.

Slowly. Think about what you're saying, who is saying it, and to whom. Because talking fast, without pausing for reflection, is only noise - the clatter of tin cans. Along with St. Teresa I'll you that, however much you move your lips, I do not call it prayer. [ St. Jose Maria Escriva, The Way]

We must be in constant battle against the ideology of "productivity" which pervades our society today. This ideology tells us that the more we do, the more productive we are. This is contrary to the true spirit of prayer. The constant "busy-ness" of our daily lives, perpetuated by a constantly moving and noisy society, is also a temptation we must fight and be on guard against within our prayer. Slowing down in prayer helps fight this "just get through it" mentality. St. Teresa of Avila had strong words about these external occupations which can consume our time with undue proportion. These same temptations can easily trickle into our mentality of prayer - we may be praying, but due to the exhausting list of things we do throughout the day, we remain exteriorly preoccupied and fail to enter within ourselves and trudge on through our prayers to speedily get through it. We become similar to those who remain outside the castle of their souls, unfamiliar with true prayer and prayer at all:

A short time ago, I was told by a very learned man that souls without prayer are like people whose bodies or limbs are paralyzed: they possess feet and hands but they cannot control them. In the same way, there are souls so infirm and so accustomed to busying themselves with outside affairs that nothing can be done for them, and it seems as though they are incapable of entering within themselves at all...and although by nature they are richly endowed as to have the power of holding converse with none other than God Himself, there is nothing that can be done for them. Unless they strive to realize their miserable condition and remedy it, they will be turned into pillars of salt for not looking within themselves, just as Lot's wife was because she looked back. [St. Teresa of Avila, Interior Castle]

So that's it: Two simple ways to deepen your prayer life today - recollect yourself before you pray and slow down!

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