I wish to conclude this three-part blog series on acedia with a look into how the vice of acedia may manifest itself in relation to time.
First, here are the links to the previous two posts:
Now, a look at the third area acedia manifests itself.
Because the vice of acedia is referenced as "the noonday devil" in Psalm 69, the desert Fathers have noted certain characterstics about this particular hour:
Noon is not only the hour where there is no shadow. It is also the moment when the sun seems to have halted and when time, which it measures, also appears to stop and hang heavy. That is when the present moment threatens to become unbearable. Two reactions are possible then: Losing the sense of time, both past and future, as nihilism does; or else, on the contrary, fleeing the present and taking refuge in the past or in the future.
The abbot goes on to tell us that when confronted with this "gloominess" of the present moment, there is a tendency to cultivate an excessive nostalgia "for the successful, well-spent moments of the past;" to embellish it, to delight in it, to tell stories about it.
When nothing goes well any more in the present, it is so reassuring to become attached to the past, when "life was so good."
Or, one plunges ahead into the future, "since that is the plaything of the imagination and of dreams." However, he goes on...
The flight into the past or the escape into the future produces nothing but sadness and disgust; one finds in them a taste bitterness and dissatisfaction.
That excessive reminiscing and dreaming never satisfies, ultimately, and just leaves one sad.
On a side note, I absolutely remember these feelings of emptiness and "mind wandering" prior to my reversion to the Faith. I reminisced of the times when things were better or set my heart upon "adventures of freedom" that I longed to go on, yet I always felt an inner sense of emptiness and dissatisfaction. These would never answer my heart's deepest yearnings. They will never answer anyone's.
As a result of this inner boredom and gloom, people quickly find a way to "pass" or "kill time," as is a common expression. Jean-Charles Nault puts it so perfectly:
Since acedia creates an empty space, people try to "furnish" it.
This inner emptiness leads one to chase amusements and pleasures - anything to divert their attention away from the dissatisfaction of living in the present moment and find meaning in it.
Now we enter into three common manifestations under this condition:
1. Temptation to doubt
2. Mediocrity
3. Distractions and compensations
Let's begin with the first manifestation...
1. Temptation to Doubt
When everything is dark, when time weighs heavily, doubt appears: you see neither the destination nor even the way leading to it on which you thought you were walking. Then you say to yourself: "What if all this was just an illusion? What if the material world was the only reality after all? What if there was nothing beyond what I can see, hear, and touch?"
Abbot Jean-Charles Nault makes an interesting connection to the mid-life crisis people may experience. He states that since the temptation to doubt is a temptation particularly of the noonday devil, and since it could also be called the "mid-day devil," it is also the demon of the "mid-life crisis," - in other words, of the turning point in life. He warns...
It awaits us, however, at any moment, even though it certainly attacks more violently toward the middle of life, at a mature age, when it is too late to "do one's life over." People often talk in this sense about the "crisis of their forties" or of their fifties, and rightly so.
It causes doubts: "Could it not be time to set off in a new direction?" or "Have I done right in committing myself to this path?"
How devastating when you hear of marriages that have ended after 15, 20 or 25 years. Could this be the demon of acedia - making one doubt their commitments, turning them to see every fault in their spouse and nothing but the unhappiness...even after all these years? Could it be the one to cause the temptation to ask, "Was this ever even the right person I committed to? It was, but it's not anymore..." Yes, it very much indeed is. And so, Abbot Jean-Charles Nault goes on:
Acedia is above all the devil who causes us to regret the decision that we have made.
Wow.
2. Mediocrity
We are given a warning by our Lord:
So because you are lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spew you out of my mouth." [Revelation 3:16]
Acedia causes us to become mediocre - lukewarm - in our daily tasks and spiritual exercises and practices. It leaves us content with "minimalism" - doing the bare minimum to barely count. The bare minimum in school, in our work, in our daily duties, in our commitment to Christ... It's just going along to get along. But really...it's causing a slow and subtle spiritual death.
A person then begins to become neglectful about little things. Minor, almost imperceptible infidelities crop up. Then, one fine day, he notices - or rather, other people notice, since the devil of acedia does everything he can to remain unknown to the person he is attacking - that he has strayed from the path, that he has lost his way.
Such negligence "reveals a lack of faith in the dignity of human action performed in the Spirit." It leads us to believe that all our seemingly insignificant work and tasks throughout the day are to be despised and mean nothing (it only counts if it gets human recognition - which is the worldly way of viewing productivity and our actions). It leads us to forget that the most seemingly insignificant gesture has great potential value in the eyes of God. But, if we forget this due to our lack of faith, it's very easy to belittle the mundane things of life and begin to give way to acedia. The abbot reminds us:
It is necessary to be able to live the present moment intensely [my emphasis added], knowing that it is an opportunity to encounter the Lord. To flee mediocrity is therefore to persevere on the narrow way that leads to salvation...it is to reject compromise and to choose holiness.
This is one reason why the Lord gives us the admonition to be faithful in even the little things - because of the subtle way we can easily slide away from God. We cut our prayer time short here, we skip a Sunday Mass there, we let a little lie slip here, and before you know it the snowball effect has begun. Negligence is deadly in the spiritual life. I'll say it again, negligence is DEADLY.
And finally, the third manifestation of acedia...
3. Distractions and compensations
Distraction is a corollary of instability, which I related to in the last post.
St. Thomas Aquinas teaches us that acedia provokes a twofold movement:
1. First, a movement of flight from what causes the sadness or disgust; then
2. A movement of active seeking: the search for compensations, distractions to fill the void.
Abbot Jean-Charles Nault goes on...
Every man can be subject to the test of time and, therefore, to the trial of boredom; boredom that is not only a passing, external phenomenon but in the end reveals a profound incapacity of the will. [my emphasis added] That is when someone may choose to be distracted, to "amuse oneself", by seeking compensations or else by falling into activism.
Now if emptiness, anxiety, boredom dwell within a being, this emptiness, anxiety, and boredom will follow him to the ends of the earth. The tenacious illusion of "always being better off elsewhere" does not abandon the individual. Anything seems preferable to self-awareness and diffuse pain.
Because acedia attacks the meaning of life and the meaning of life that each moment is truly "pregnant" with, it drives the senses to distraction. And so, we see the appearance of the "daughters of acedia" that St. Thomas Aquinas gives us:
1. Mental flightiness: Multiple pursuits and ideas that present themselves to my mind attract me, solely because they deliver me from I ought to do at this precise moment! They bounce from one thing to the next, swiftly and easily.
Whereas, on the contrary, we need to be able to discover the spiritual motivation of each action because "the present activity is the place of my encounter with God."
2. Garrulousness: A person flees thought so as to take refuge in excessive speech and curiosity. Such garrulousness and curiosity about the business and lives of others (be it those we know, those we hear of "through the grapevine," or even celebrities), are a sign of a lack of substance in one's own personal life.
3. Physical agitation: The inability of the body to stay in the same place. This involves pursuits that often take one away from the home or one's city. - either permanently or a habit of vacationing.
4. Activism: Another way of fleeing. This does not only relate to the physical need to be constantly going and doing, but a disordered activism that leads to inventing constantly new things to do. This activism is a flight that is supposed to make up for the dread of nothingness or facing the reality of things or one's inner void - however small that may be.
Acedia is a very subtle vice, yet very dangerous, as we can see. In the end, instead of being "bored" by time, or trying to flee from it, let us see each moment as the opportunity to encounter and remain with God, for it truly is!