There are people who like to label the Catholic Church as "condemning" or "judgemental." There have been for the past 2,000+ years...and there always will be. And while there may be certain individuals within the Catholic Church who carry this arrogant, 'holier than thou" attitude, it certainly does not reflect how the Catholic Church "mothers" mankind.
One of the most common images of the Church used by pious and devout Christians throughout the centuries and centuries of her existence is that of "mother." Holy Mother Church. All mankind, specifically all Catholics in a fuller way, are children of the Church. We are her children. A good mother guides, directs, informs, admonishes, protects, corrects, disciplines, and watches over her children because she loves, cares, delights, respects, and honors them. She does this all while respecting our free will. St. John Paul II says we "propose the truth, but not impose it." The Church proposing the truth to us, encourages us to walk in the ways of Christ, yet does not force it upon us. In the end, we have the freedom to accept or reject it. This is where our human freedom can become a scary thing...if we use our freedom to choose sin and evil rather than what is good and true.
I'd like to use this analogy. Picture a mother who warns her child to not run out into the street. You would hope that the child would listen to his mother because he loves and respects her. Yet the mother, in her need to explain why her child shouldn't run out into the street, goes on to say that if he did, he could get hit by a car and become badly injured or that he could even die. This is reality that she shares in her motherly way because she loves and cares for him. Now if the child doesn't listen to his mother because he wants to respect, please, and love her, then at the least he will do it because he fears the loss of his life or becoming hurt. The mother protects her child from the loss of his life by setting out boundaries and warning her son by informing him of the danger.
So too is the Church our mother. This is why the Catholic Church will stand up to echo the words of Christ - the Catholic Church is that audible voice of Christ in our world today. She loves you and desires each of you to be saved and inherit eternal life through what her spouse, Jesus Christ, did on the Cross (Ephesians 5). And so sometimes she needs to warn us of following sinful ways that endanger our salvation - especially sinful ways that are rampant in our culture (abortion, pornography, the sexual immorality, same-sex 'marriage,' contraception, greed, selfishness, and the like) ...the Church is our mother.
St. Alphonsus Liguori - a great Doctor of the Church - said that from time to time the faithful need to be reminded of our need for eternal salvation: That if we don't repent and live the ways of Christ, we will go to hell. Hell is real, it exists. Unfortuantely, there are many who say it's just a "state of mind," or that it doesn't really exist. There are even Catholic priests whom I've encountered who deny these things and are unfortunately misleading many souls. This is why we need to know the Scriptures and Catechism of the Catholic Church, because there are even Catholics - by name only - who do not really believe what Catholics are supposed to believe to have eternal salvation. One time, a woman came up to St. Padre Pio and told him, "I don't believe in hell Father!" St. Padre Pio responded, "Oh don't worry...you will when you get there."
When the Catholic Church speaks out and says certain things are offensive to God, she is acting like a mother who warns her child not to run out into the street....because if we do continue to commit serious sins without repenting and trying to turn away from them, and then we die before we are ready and have not repented, then we will go to hell. ...Just like that child who doesn't listen to his mother, runs out in the street, gets hit by a car and dies. A good mother will remind her child, yell at him as he's running toward the street with an on-coming car, run after him...anything to stop that child from getting hit or possibly dieing. The Church will teach us what is offensive to God and remind us of the eternal consequences of hell if we don't listen. Through the power of the Holy Spirit, the Church will do all she can to save her children and bring them to that perfect final end for which we were ALL made: heaven. Perfect love, joy, peace and communion with God. So then, even if a person does not listen to the Church because they love or respect the Church, at the least, for their soul to be saved, they'll at least try to understand and live by her teachings because they fear hell. We shouldn't aim for heaven because we fear hell though - love is the fulfillment of the law. We should strive for heaven because we love God. That's what Jesus wants. Yet in the end, if one chooses to listen to the Church because they fear hell and the eternal consquences if they don't, then so be it - their soul will be saved. Yet they should strive for perfect charity. Even if a person "does all they should do" like go to church on Sunday, is involved in ministries, and so on, yet they do this without love, they are nothing. These are the words of St. Paul in Scripture. We NEED love too. But sometimes being reminded of hell gives us that "kick in the butt" we need to "work out our salvation in fear and trembling" (Philippians 2:12) to try to love the Lord and others better.
And THAT is what is most important: the salvation of your soul. THAT is true mercy. It is merciful for the Church to remind us that hell is real, it exists, and that if we don't turn away from our sins, we will end up there. The people who get offended at hearing this, or get offended at being told certain things are sinful, are those who are probably not living according to Church teaching - the ways of Jesus... Yet these are the ones who need to hear it most. A good mother will tell her children of the consequences of running out into the street without looking, not pretend like they won't happen, or avoid talking about it...like many people do, even some of our beloved priests. Pray for them that they have courage to remind us of these things.
The Church is your mother! It is good that she speaks out and directs us in the ways that are pleasing (or not pleasing) to God. With the horrendous false doctrine of your own private interpretation of the Bible started by the Protestant revolution some 500 years ago, many denominations and Christians use Scripture to justify their own sinful ways. Today now, hotly debated among Christian denominations, is if same-sex 'marriage' is acceptable. Wow really? Yet this is the fall-out of making yourself your own authority. It's inconsistent. This is why being Catholic is a blessing, because if you look in Scripture and throughout the history of Christianity, you will see one clear voice to whom Christ has given the authority to teach in His name: The Catholic Church.
The Church is your mother.
And on a final note, do not be turned away from the Catholic Church by those within the
Church (whom maybe you've encountered in the past) who do not reflect her gentle love and mercy and instead portray a Church as cold and condemning, "holier than thou," cut off from ministering to her children. Sometimes a mother will admonish her child with a quick chide which may be needed to quickly snap her child out of his misbehavior, but then after she will always gently and lovingly explain why certain things are unacceptable. The Church is concerned for your salvation, and therefore helps us "know our boundaries" because she desires you to come to know and love Christ so you can be in heaven one day!
Praise God for His gentleness and mercy, and for His wisdom in giving us the Church to guide and teach us what is pleasing and not pleasing to Him in our ever-changing times.